Gaslighting in a Nutshell

This pretty much sums up how I felt after finding out about my husband's deception. My BFF used to say this all the time about her now ex-spouse, it wasn't until my own experience that it truly made sense.

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I was coming home anyway…

That's the excuse for coming home drunk and suddenly not being interested in having dinner with me. Ask me to a movie and then wasn’t able to go because he’s” too exhausted”. And I don’t doubt that since he’s been working again and racking up some overtime. I thought it was a lofty idea to…

Boozing on the job…

-from my personal journal (4/23/18) Drunk and Not Finished Pretty sure he was drunk today, hadn’t moved from his chair in front of the computer, from the moment I got in till I woke up around 5ish. Said he worked in inventory in his work van clearly he did not. He came to lay down…

Venting

~from my personal journal (3-27-18) ~ HATE I hate my life, I hate myself, I hate me. I’m worthless and nothing. I mean nothing, I am nothing, Why am I here? Why do I try? What’s the point? He would rather seek the company of strangers or the bottom of a bottle. I have no…

A Little TMI…

~ from my personal journal (3-26-18) FUCKTARD I wanted to have sex today, made it very clear Bc in the past he’s stated that’s what he needs me to do… He farted around made every excuse in the world to avoid me, but has plenty of fucking time to get some booze and drink it…

I’m a sucker…

The night before Thanksgiving was pretty eventful. I decided I wasn't going to stay in the chaos and rented a room for me and my girls. We went to show downtown and had a nice evening. Went home the next morning to get my AH out of bed so his girls wouldn't have to explain…

Loneliness

It’s incredibly lonely being the wife of an alcoholic. You realize you've lost yourself and lost site of your future. You can never plan anything, you never know when he’ll be in the throws a raging bender,vomiting everywhere or experiencing shakes comparable to Parkinson’s . This dream you had of growing old together is a…